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Old 03-12-2010, 03:17 PM   #500 (permalink)
Flick Montana
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Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Beech Grove, Indiana *sigh*
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Okay, so I went boarding on Wednesday and, like every red-blooded American, I had to take a piss.

So I head up to the urinal, which goes all the way to the floor so that I can more easily piss on my own boots, and I find that the floor around it is tapered toward the wall so that people who have the aim of a Somalian militia fighter don't leave stinking yellow puddles where everyone else stands. That's fine except that snowboard boot are built with a lean since you have your knees bent most of the time.

After I finish digging out my unit from 30 layers of clothing, which by the way is like feeding a peanut through a hole in a phone book, I come to find that I can't stand up properly to take my whiz.

I have a few options:
A) I can stand 5 feet away in a crouch, which makes me look quite insane.
B) I can prop my toes up against the wall and pray they don't slip causing me to lose control of what I like to call "the firehose".
C) I can stand normally and just lay my face against the strange brown and green wall tile.

Why can't they just design a proper toilet so that my urinary excursions aren't so difficult? Whatever.

/rant
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