I'm a lyricist too, but I wouldn't post a video of myself rapping into a webcam. That's just asking for hate.
To critique your actual lyricism, you aren't bad at all. Multi-syllable rhymes and decent metaphors. Try to add more word-play if you are inspired by Em.
The one thing I dislike about your rhymes is your cadence. You do go with the beat, but it sounds like you have no heart. You have a sleepy style and it just doesn't work.
Put some more intensity behind your rapping. The lyrics just don't match up with the cadence.
Well, that's my honest two cents.