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post #26 of (permalink) Old 08-06-2012, 09:09 AM
Leo's Avatar
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Detroit Area
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I'm a lyricist too, but I wouldn't post a video of myself rapping into a webcam. That's just asking for hate.

To critique your actual lyricism, you aren't bad at all. Multi-syllable rhymes and decent metaphors. Try to add more word-play if you are inspired by Em.

The one thing I dislike about your rhymes is your cadence. You do go with the beat, but it sounds like you have no heart. You have a sleepy style and it just doesn't work.

Put some more intensity behind your rapping. The lyrics just don't match up with the cadence.

Well, that's my honest two cents. Reviews and David Z's rants
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