alright, it looks like learning how to wax is in my future but until then i will be using my free waxes at sportcheck
Seems like you already had your mind made up before you made this thread
Plenty of threads here and all over the internetz to show you how to wax your board. Seriously, take the time to read them, watch them, and learn from them. You AND your board will appreciate it in the end.
Boards love a good waxing and don't be afraid to drip a little on yourself for the same pleasure.