Holy fucking shit. You know how with most things that people talk about being the worst thing ever after you go through them you look back and say, "Meh, that sucked but it wasn't THAT bad.". Well, a tonsillectomy as an adult IS THAT BAD.
I had it done on March 28th. It was originally scheduled April 4th, but I bumped it up just to get it over with. A little back story... I've had one enlarged tonsil since a bout of strep throat last summer. I'd been to two ENTs to have it looked at and both were kinda like, "It's probably not a big deal. I don't think it's cancer, but it could be." Wait. WTF?! What is that? What can i do with this information? I talked to a buddy of mine in the medical field out here and he referred me to a third ENT. He told me this guy was a straight shooter and would tell me what to do. Cool.
Went to the 3rd ENT and he broke it down for me. He said he basically agreed with the other two ENTs. It's probably not cancer, but no ENT can tell me it's definitively not as asymmetrical tonsils are a potential indicator for malignancy but as a lone factor it's a pretty weak indicator. Basically, I'm looking at a 3% chance of cancer. Now, a 3% chance of cancer is basically no chance of cancer unless it's YOUR 3% chance. He further explains that based on my age, we can probably estimate my chances are lower than that 3% risk, but 3% is the only clinically researched number he can give me. So, I say fuck it, let's take them out.
First three days, I'm thinking shit I got this. This sucks, it's the worst sore throat ever and I can't eat or sleep, but this isn't THAT bad.
Fourth day I woke up and was like, okay this definitely stepped up a notch. That night I end up in the ER bleeding from my throat like a bad horror movie.
Fifth day, fuck. This is really starting to suck.
Sixth day... are you fucking serious?! This has to be the worst of it. I still got this.
Seventh day. This was the day I nearly broke. Worst pain of my life bar none. Pure hell.
Eight day. I think I may be feeling slightly better, but this sucks so bad that I'm not sure about that. I might just be anticipating the game. Can't wait until the Heels win the natty tonight. That'll definitely make me feel better... Fuck my life.
Ninth day, okay I've finally turned the corner. I'm gonna survive.
I'm on day 12 now and it still sucks, but mainly because of the constant feeling of something g stuck in my throat. I'm back to sleeping like normal, but still can't eat much at all.
In conclusion, a tonsillectomy as an adult really is about the pinnacle of suck. The pain is one thing, but it's greatly compounded by the fact that you can't eat or sleep so while your pain is ramping up, you're physically and mentally growing ever weaker. The other thing is that the pain peaks so late. With every other injury I've ever had from broken ribs to torn ligaments, the pain peaks somewhere around day three or four and then you can tell you've turned the corner. That's a big mental lift. Not so with a tonsillectomy. Around the time you'd start to feel as if you've turned the corner with most other injuries, you're just getting started with the real suck.
On the good news side of the spectrum, I got my biopsy results back this morning and I don't have cancer. That's pretty fucking sweet