My Special Snake Oil Has 'Molecules'! - Snowboarding Forum - Snowboard Enthusiast Forums
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Old 08-14-2012, 05:40 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default My Special Snake Oil Has 'Molecules'!

Has anyone noticed this trend in television commercials marketing everything from makeup to gasoline? All of a sudden everything works because it has 'molecules' or 'secret micro-particles'!

Every time one of these commercials comes on I'm baffled. Are people actually fooled by this nonsense? I imagine it must go something like this:

Salesman - "Hey you! Come here and buy my special Nimshmuckle Face Sauce and all your horrendous oozing pimples will vanish overnight! Only 3 payments of 34.99!"

Intelligent Consumer - "I don't know man....that sound too good to be true and your face sauce kind of smells like A1..."

Salesman - "Our Nimshmuckle Face Sauce is specially formulated with molecules and active nano particles!"

Intelligent Consumer - "Oh it has molecules!?!" MUST! HAVE! NOW! I'll take 10!"


Last edited by baldylox; 08-14-2012 at 05:49 PM.
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Old 08-14-2012, 06:13 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Commercials are just straight up stupid. All of them. Prescription drug commercials, and the subsequent law office commercials advising people to sue em are some of the worst.

Look for this the next time you see a commercial for a new prescription drug... Commercial airs (Birth Control, Anti-Depressant, Dick growth formula, whatever). 12-18 months later there's a commercial for a law office telling people to sue whatever company it was selling the new drug. It will be something along the lines of "If you or a loved one have taken ______ and suffered ______ you may be entitled to damages". EVERY FUCKING TIME.
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Old 08-14-2012, 08:20 PM   #3 (permalink)
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It's all about praying on the lack of knowledge which stupid people have, and using that to your advantage in order to manipulate them.

We've already seen tons of advertising trends since consumerism got real mass-media-ee. It goes in cycles, because eventually even the stupid people realize they are just being fed bullshit. I stopped watching TV a long time ago, but I know one of the real big strategies right now is "Greenwashing".

Look on most consumer items today and there will be some sort of plug on the product about how "Blah blah and blah is a green initiative company and this thing is made out of blah blah % recycled paper". If you read between the lines, most of the time they are just spinning words, and the product is no less green than it ever has been.

My favorite was a jar of Planters peanuts made out of plastic. Here was the greenwashing plug:

"This container uses 30% less material than the old version!"

Fine print: "Material is based on weight". Guess what the old version was made out of? Glass. Of course glass is fucking heavier than plastic.
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Old 08-14-2012, 09:08 PM   #4 (permalink)
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I wont fall into any of these traps unless the molecules are active!
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Old 08-14-2012, 09:54 PM   #5 (permalink)
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What I get a kick out of are the totally-made-up active ingredient names. Do chemists really know of a chemical called "cleansyourfacium" ?

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Old 08-14-2012, 10:12 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Old 08-14-2012, 11:32 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Just have to be a label reader and get over the fact commercials are for the fucking stupid.

Green washing is the most stupid thing on the planet right now, I hate that it's leaked over into snowboarding and I have companies making boards in Austria telling me their shit is more green than the guys that heat their factory off the left over wood from the core production.
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Old 08-15-2012, 12:25 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Yes but, does it blend?
Did she say Strap-in or Strap-on?
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Old 08-15-2012, 01:07 AM   #9 (permalink)
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Well the public is stupid.

Really though, it seems to be a sort of trend that companies use words stupid people don't understand to make their product sound so "high tech" that it far surpasses any other product. Here's a prime example:

Nanowax. "OMFG, NANO, its not just wax it's nanowax, I better buy that!"

I've also noticed the use of lasers a lot more recently.
  • Laser hair removal, acne treatment, stretch mark treatment, wrinkles
  • Laser treatment to curb appetite
  • Laser treatment to quick smoking

I guess people think lasers are a new revolutionary idea to cure all ails. Frankly, I only see lasers as a good use in concerts and to make my cat go nuts. I don't watch television anymore though, so I don't have to watch that garbage (and political ads)
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Old 08-22-2012, 11:22 AM   #10 (permalink)
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I can't wait for penis enlargement pills with nano technology
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