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Old 12-28-2013, 09:24 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Ass pain

i really took a seat today off a kicker in carinthia. lets just say i havent really sat down much since. i'd like to go back out tomorrow so i need to heal it as quick as possible, any suggestions?
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Old 12-28-2013, 09:27 PM   #2 (permalink)
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1000 mg tylenol? Jack Daniels? Heroin? ER Visit? Have someone kiss it?
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Old 12-28-2013, 09:40 PM   #3 (permalink)
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did you really expect anything more than smartass comments?
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Old 12-28-2013, 09:47 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Contusions require cold and compression in the first 24-48 hours. Ibuprofen will help too. Wear some compression shorts if you have some. Also helps to stretch and walk a little before retiring for the evening.
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Old 12-28-2013, 09:48 PM   #5 (permalink)
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KY jelly.

Just messing. Soak in hot ass water and a pain killer.
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Old 12-28-2013, 09:53 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Rum, lots and lots of rum.
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Old 12-28-2013, 10:11 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Duct tape this to your ass. Or wise up and fall on your face next time.

Seriously, no magic pill there. Aside from morphine based ones. Just let it heal.
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Old 12-28-2013, 10:47 PM   #8 (permalink)
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impact shorts, crash pad, hip protector, skele-shorts

Too late for this time, but it will prevent it in the future
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Old 12-28-2013, 11:30 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Sounds like your cocksis is busted, I mean your coccyx. bruising will come.
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Old 12-29-2013, 12:28 AM   #10 (permalink)
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Get a hemorrhoid donut. Seriously.
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