First I feel so sorry you went to work at Keystone, fuck that place. Also welcome to a life of indentured servitude.
The buildings are a bit old, built some time in the 80's and has its quirks. The whole complex is divided to snow carnies on one side and Mexicans on the other. Black mold sometimes is prevalent so just inspect upon moving in and bitch your complaints early on. Also water pressure/hot water can be an issue you'll figure that out early on.
You will meet lots of interesting people just like you would if you joined the military, some are cool, most will fucking suck. In fact I stick to the mantra 99% of them will fucking suck. Also if you move in before the season is rolling expect everyone to claim how fucking awesome they are and how they are gods gift to snowboarding. Note the 99% will fucking suck theory.
Herpes was the epidemic 3 years ago, crabs 2 years ago, last year it was the clap, this year I'm going with AIDS. We haven't had an AIDS epidemic in about a decade up here. So while you think it's fun to hook up with that swamp donkey on your floor so did every other guy. Plus it's Keystone you are in a fucking bubble of suck, literally! Wrap it before you tap it and playing just the tip is not encouraged.
If you have a car do not let people know as you will become their new best friend and they will have you driving all over the county, or perhaps you want fake friends then tell them. If you don't, learn the bus schedule and the stops. The routes change around Thanksgiving. Driving to Breck to party is fun but running the drunken gauntlet is not recommended as the cops have nothing better to do than give out DUI's.
Get a City Market Card as the Dillon City Market is the best grocery store in the county. If you do decide to drink make friends with the people at Locals Liquors in Silverthorne that is the cheapest you will find whiskey and PBR which will become your staple diets.
If you end up on the Ramen diet remember that one pack has enough sodium for 3 days in it. Scurvy does exist and is making a comeback.
As you are indentured to the mountain remember that they own your soul. Your actions on and off the hill can have repercussions that effect your living situation, pass, job, etc. etc. If you can opt to get a night shift immediately do it this will give you more ride time, if you can't you're fucked. In the preseason your pass is not good at A basin till Keystone opens and blackouts suck so be prepared for a lot of down time while the rest of us are having fun.
Don't be silly wrap your willy.
You get a Vail employee discount at MSO remember this is a privilege not a right don't abuse it or treat those employees there like dicks. Chances are they know more than you and they're not afraid to call the head of HR and get you fired. See the whole "mountain owns your soul" clause above.
Remember you are a guest in this county treat it like your backyard and have respect for it. There are those that live up here that do not give a fuck you just moved here or work for the mountain but do care that you are not destructive to their community.
Free dinners on Tuesdays at the Elk Club in Silverthorne. Get there early i.e. pre 5 p.m. as that's when the best food is served and you can get double desserts. Watch out for the SFC (Snowboarders for Christ) they will try to get you to sip their Kool-Aid, but they have a mini ramp and peak season sometimes do free dinner 7 nights a week. This will beat Ramen or resort food.
Tip your bartenders/servers. Also watch out for the she beast of a waitress at Dos Locos in the 5 years I've seen her there she's always had a black eye and hates life.
Don't be a fool vulcanize your tool!
The care clinic is OK at Keystone but if you need medical attention take the free bus, drive, get a ride to Frisco to the hospital and walk in. This will save you a 1,200 dollar ambulance bill if they deem you need to be transported.
You are here to serve tourists and those "gapers" remember that. At all costs you are to make them feel welcome as they drive the tourism of this county. Only as a last resort are you to vibe them out or fight them. Love thy tourist!
If you are going to hike Loveland Pass don't be a moron and go unprepared. Death is kind of permanent.
Be kind to the real locals of Summit they will in turn be kind to you.
Do not pester people about "smoke shacks, secret runs, or hidden stashes" if you're cool you will be shown the goods, if you suck you will be neglected and left to wallow in the icy shit that is Keystone.
Do go to Vail and Beaver Creek! Remember to get free cookies at 3 p.m. at the Beave and if you want to feel rich get the free champagne at the toast at 3:20. Do not pay for parking in Vail.
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Because someone has to call it how they see it!